Thursday 13 October 2011

witty funny one liners


  • What are the three words that men hate to hear during sex?
    "Are you done?"
  • What are the three words women hate to hear during sex?
    "Honey, I'm home!"
  • What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
    45 pounds.
  • What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
    45 minutes.
  • What is it when a man talks dirty to a woman?
    Sexual harassment.
  • What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man?
    $3.99 a minute.
  • What is the definition of "making love"?
    Something a woman does while a guy is screwing her.
  • What do you call a woman who is paralyzed from the waist down?
    Married.
  • What's worse than a male chauvinist pig?
    A woman that won't do what she's told.
  • How can you tell if your wife is dead?
    The sex is the same, but the dishes pile up.
  • How can you tell if your husband is dead?
    The sex is the same, but you get the remote.
  • What's the difference between men and pigs?

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