Friday, 14 October 2011

great funny one liners

Why are there no asprins in the jungle?
Because the Parots-ate-em-all
Why was the Energizer Bunny arrested?
He was charged with battery.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
Why do gerillas have big nostralls?
Coz they got big fingers!!!!!!!!!
What's the difference between a woman with PMS and a Pitt Bull?
My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.

 I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian

 If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.

 I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.

 If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.

Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.

You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

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