Thursday 20 October 2011

very very funny one liners


A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
All right, let’s not panic! I’ll make the money by selling one of my livers. I can get by with one.
When will I learn? The answer to life’s problems aren’t at the bottom of a bottle, they’re on TV!
Telling a lie is a fault for a little boy, an art for a lover, an accomplishment for a bachelor, and a Matter of survival for a married man/woman
‎”The only time a girl should fall on her knees for a guy, is the day she tie her son’s shoe-laces.”
Living on Earth is so expensive, but at least it includes a free trip round the Sun! :
I just love it when in a horror movie they yell out “hello?” it like what do they expect the killer to say “yeah I’m in the kitchen want a soda
Best lines by a cockroach to a young man, “I can make your girlfriend scream louder than you can
In 19th century masturbation was a disease…!!!!
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In this 21st Century masturbation is a cure…!!!
Daughter: Mummy Jack said me to climb the tree ! :/
Mummy: That sick mannered boy ! He wanted to see your panty ! :P
Daughter : I was very clever i removed it before climbing
i heard my neighbour stands in front of mirrors with his eyes closed ,he wants to see what he looks like asleep
what food decreases a womans sex drive by 90%…….wedding cake

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